DAAL FLY




A nice Tuesday evening. Noggy has just returned from work and realises neha will be late. Aha here is a chance to impress the woman he thinks and decides to cook for her (and himself ofcourse).
Now his knowledge and ability to cook borders on atrocious so he gets the best help he can ... GOOGLE ... he types in "how to cook dal fry" and out pops a dozen and some more links.
Choosing the first he gets to down to the actual making of the dal fry now. A pressure cooker says the site and finding one he decides AHA ... now the girl will be impressed. Soaking the dal and turmeric adding later the cooker is closed and on the gas. In the meantime he gets down to making a good salad. Onions, cucumber, tomatoes go chop chop, squeeze the lemon on top, taste it ... puurrrfect ... "am I good or what he thinks".
In the meantime, the cooker has blown its whistle and is ready to be taken down from the gas and kept aside according to the site. That done, he now makes a little tadka as per the site requirements. HMMMMM smells heavenly. Will she be impressed or what!
Now he goes back to the site which says add the daal to the tadka ... cool that’s the simplest part. He tries to open the cooker ... oo stuck is it ... let’s try harder ... and harder ... and HARDER STILL.
The next 3 seconds are absolutely blank in Noggy's mind. All he can remember is 3 seconds later, there is daal on the ceiling, the cooker lid a little away, daal on the floor, the cooker whistle a little more away, daal all around. HUH HOW did that happen? Anyway he doesn’t panic ... he has to clean this up before the girl comes in. So what does he do? Fills a bucket of water, takes a mug and starts splashing it all around. Even on the ceiling, ofcourse it falls right back onto him.
AND THEN THE DREADED NOISE. "TING TING"
There's the doorbell. OOPS! She’s here!
HE slowly opens the door a crack, smiles his most benevolent smile and says "I love u" ... the girl realises something is amiss. She wasn’t expecting a banquet but nor was she expecting a wet guy smelling of daal, warning her not to go into the kitchen.
But she scarcely heeds his words and walks right in ... she surveys the damage...
Daal daal daal, some vessels, daal, daal, ooo you can see the ceiling here, daal, daal, what was the colour of the walls of the kitchen again? Wasn’t yellow for sure (it was pink)! And why is the kitchen ankle deep in water?
She turns around, picks up the phone and says,
"Hello DOMINOS"

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